Ups and Downs

Been a while. That seems to be how I start my blogs entries these days…It has been 18 days since my last entry.

What can I say really? There have been lots of good things…and some serious things.

Most notable of the good things are…Ever since I’ve moved in with the two of the people that I care most about in my rather pathetic life, I have never been happier. It hasn’t been that long really…what..a month? just over a month? Everything just seems amazing here. R* and S* are the best things to happen in my life. More on that later. Also, my search for a better job may be at an end. Here is a breakdown of how things are here at work. First, there are three of us who work the night time Courtesy Patrol. We do not work the same days, but we do work the same amount of total hours for each pay period. I work Sunday and Monday nights, another works Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, and another works Friday and Saturday. We all work a total of 38 hours per pay period. That’s per two weeks. Yeah…not many hours at all…but good for college students. I’ve been here for almost six years now…the Friday and Saturday guy has been here almost seven or even eight. The other guy not that long. I’ve been casually looking for another job this past month…when I learn that the Tues/Wed/Thurs guy is quitting. I get an idea…Since I’ve been looking for a job with more hours I suggest that I take his days on top of that. At first it was turned down, but then my boss brought the idea up to her “boss”. And from there things moved forward. The idea was partially accepted. I now work Sunday-Wednesday and the other guy works Thursday-Saturday. Our nightly hours are set, and I will be working more hours than the other guy. I’ll be working 64 hours a paycheck (on average). Then we have to go to a meeting…It is an all inclusive meeting…every employee from every section of this particular branch has to attend. It was a long meeting but some good information was gained. First, they are now going to match up to 4% of retirement. So if I start the retirement plan then that means that if I put 4% of my earnings into it…then they will match it…free money. The other thing is that they said…that by the beginning of next year 2010…every employee will make no less than $13 an hour.
At first I had doubts…before when I was only working two nights a week…I was not considered a regular employee…but this new change bumps us up to that…even insurance and all that. So..if they hold true to their word…starting next year I will be making nearly $20,000 a year as a part-time employee. How awesome is that? Yeah, its not rich people wages…but hey…it is good enough for me and will give me time to work on my writing/photography/etc. Though I still have some doubts about that.

On to some serious stuff…since the cat is out of the bag now. Something has come up between me and my friends. And the result could be…hurtful to some. I don’t want my friends to hurt…I wish things could be differently..It kills me inside to think that I am hurting the people I love so much. And I do. I love my friends. I love them both so very much. And I am currently blaming myself. If it was not for me, then this would not have happened. I wish we could be just one big happy family…or something…I’m not even sure what I’m saying. My head is still a jumble…has been a jumble…but even more so now. I do not know how this will even turn out. It’s a cliffhanger at the end of a book or show. A “To be continued…?” caption. -sigh-

It seems every time something good happens something bad has to come along…to balance it out or something.

Life/Fate/etc: Oh look! You don’t have to run around looking for a job that will kill your time and spirit…here stay where you are! Things are looking up!.
Me: Oh yay! I’m happy!
Life/Fate/etc: Oh, and by the way, you are going to bring about sadness and pain to your dearest and most loved friends.
Me: T_T

Today has been one emotional up and down day…and there are no signs of the turbulence easing up.

Obligatory New Year Post

Well, as most of you know…it is now 2011. A new year. Figured I’d make a post before the second.
2010 was…odd. It had its good times, it had its horrible times, and towards the end it had wonderful times. Everything has been like living in a haze for the past several days. Friends, loved ones and the like really made the end of 2010 worthwhile.

As far as the updates for my rather uninteresting life…I finally got around to paying on that ticket I got a month ago. I took the defensive driving class…found out that I should have paid the ticket first then took the class, but since they were not clear on that they gave me some leeway. I have many hangups about law enforcement types, but the people over at the JP office are quite nice, understanding and seem to do whatever they can to make things easier. I have great respect for them, and that is saying something. They even gave me another month to work on my truck registration.

This last week has been quite fun. Lots of hanging out with friends, going out of town to eat at yummy places like IHOP and Long John’s, watching Fringe, late nights, and the like. New Year’s Eve was interesting. There were no original plans for a party or anything, but we kind of made one. On the way out of town, to go eat, R* decided that getting liquor was needed, so we stop by M*’s and see what needs to be stocked up on, and that started the plans for the New Year party. We leave, go eat, go to the liquor store and stock up. I decided to buy some Gin, as I’ve never had gin before and wanted to try…so I get that, some tonic, a blue shot glass (just because) and some cheap scotch (more on that later). R* and S* pick up some whiskey, some Arrogant Bastard Ale (stout…very stout), a beer called Hobgoblin (delicious…even for a dark), some Pumpkin Spice Beer (yum), and something else I can’t quite recall that has yet to be sampled (well for me at least). We get back home and wait until the party.
It started quite early…with just a few of us (the party wasnt a big one…which is a good thing) I mix my own and very first Gin and Tonic. It was quite good. Not my favorite mixed drink, but a good one. Then we show off the very cheap scotch I bought. It was $10 and a rather good size of a bottle. It looked scary. It’s name…Clan MacGregor. How awesome of a name is that?!! Well, M* decides to start things off by taking a rather large chug of this straight from the bottle. We all looked terrified as he did this. After a moment, I decided to try as well. I chugged a fair amount..then chased it with my G&T…that burned. The scotch wasn’t really bad…it had a good taste to it buy also a powerful powerful burn…it was like drinking burnt whiskey. R* decided to give it a shot…then S* out chugged us all…and she was already a little toasty to begin with. I, not one to be shown up…chugged again. This stuff took a bit…then hit you all at once…it was not even 9pm when we were all extremely tipsy if not drunk…after that…some Arrogant Bastard…and the rest of my G&T I was three sheets to the wind. So much so, that I couldn’t even finish my glass of whiskey..which I was sipping on for a while. Though of course I chugged some more of the scotch later. Luckily no one got sick.
Lots of fuzzy moments happened. Tops came off, some Soul Caliber was played…some chatting…etc. Then came midnight and with it the new year…and some champagne…it seems I am not a champagne person.
Soon we sobered up…went home and R* crashed immediately…me and S* tried to watch Zombieland but ended up getting sleepy…so she went to bed then I went to mine. I meant to stay up a bit longer but completely passed out…woke up around 6am with a rather bad headache and extremely thirsty. I drank a bottle and a half of water…took some pills for my headache and dozed off. Woke up around 10 or 11am feeling perfectly fine.
We hung out a bit…got lunch..finished Zombieland…and I went back to bed because work was in my future.
And that brings me to now…sitting at work…thinking over these past few days. Liking it all, loving it all…but still confused.

-sneak attack-

Tis the Season

Happy Holidays! All in all the holiday stuff here was quite fun and awesome as well. Where to start….
My roomies S* and R* went to S*’s mom’s on friday for food, gifts and family time. Which left me at the house…to do some sneaky stuff. While they were out I slipped off to Hastings and got them some gifts. I gave S* an old school TMNT Donatello bobblehead collectible and R* the complete series of Trigun. I knew they would like them, wasn’t 100% sure that Donatello was S*’s favorite Turtle or not…it was thank goodness, and R* seemed quite happy as well. Very soon after I handed out the sneaky gifts, S* tossed her collectible deviantArt Dude plushie at me. I was confused at first, then she clarified it was a gift to me. I was shocked. They don’t make these any more…I had to ask and see if she really wanted to do this…but she insisted. I wanted to tackle her with a great big hug, but that might have seemed strange or awkward. Just hope she knows how much that meant to me.

Saturday came and I, having skipped out on my family’s Christmas gathering for several reasons, slept in after a late night. I knew R* and S* were heading to R*’s dad’s place for Christmas. Turns out they went and came back before I woke up. S* was sleeping in bed having stayed up all night and R* was playing games and such. We hung out for a bit and the like until evening/night rolled around and we all went to a restaurant for what is apparently an annual thing of R* and his brother. Things were a bit weird that night. R*’s brother refused to join us in the smoking section…we were there because a) it is the most comfortable section and b) we have friends coming over who smoke. I’m not nagging on R*’s brother or anything, so don’t get me wrong. It just seemed odd, especially since no matter where you sit in that place…you are going to smell smoke. It’s a given. But oh well.
Our friends showed up and they were having an argument…and etc. My thoughts were “geez, I skipped my family’s christmas stuff to get away from arguments and bad moods.” Though eventually things mellowed out and we all headed home and our friends Red and her boyfriend came by to play Apples to Apples. That game is amazing. So simple and so fun, and so much potential for evil…well…the fun evil. Play the game…then you’ll understand. So, we played for a while, then they took off. Eventually R* went to bed and S* and I hung out for a while, watching netflix and the like.

Sunday…earlier I had my coworker cover for me for sunday night…for the following reason. Christmas party/gift exchange game at the M*’s. It was fun. I let C* use the gift that Red got for me to give…and I gifted my black leather trench. It doesn’t fit me…never had…I got it as a gift…it has been worn maybe once…so I figured..eh…I’m not going to get anything for it if I try to sell it….might as well give it away. I let S* try it on before I wrapped it…oh my mad wrapping skills…and it fit…she loved it. Her gift was a hand painted wooden box with a set of dice inside. It was awesome…sheer epicness. I so wanted it, but when the party came a long…I let Red have it. S* got my jacket and no one tried to take it from her. There was the tangible aura that said “take this…you die.” lol People liked the trench…but non dared to swipe it. I swiped a Han Solo M&M dispenser. It’s cool.

There were a couple of people there that I didn’t care to hang around with. But I survived…even the girly display of testing perfumes. Jeezus, my nose was in pain.

Tomorrow…or rather today…I need to head to the courthouse and pay my fine. Probably will do so in the morning…Go home…chill..go to courthouse…pay fine.

I know there are some things I’m missing…hmmm

Oh, Going to be starting a weekly (probably weekly) zombie survival blog starting in 2011. R* got a Zombie Survival Guide Calender and the journal entry things on the back of each day gave him the idea to start a daily one and asked others to as well. Daily will be a bit much for me. But, weekly should work. I mean, I don’t even keep up with this one that often.

All in all, these past several days have been amazing. Some wonderful realizations…some complications…but amazing. Wouldn’t trade them for the world.
Even my neurotic tendencies have mellowed out. Though not completely…and probably never will completely. But that’s ok.

Cloud Cover

So, the last few days and nights have been…well, they’ve been many things.
Monday night was a good one. After a bit of sleep I hung out with S* and R* until it was time for work. I tried to get my shift covered but that was a fail. Monday night was also the full lunar eclipse. It was beautiful. After I left for work, my roomies went to a friend’s house, then later S* sent me a text that she was coming over to my work to watch the eclipse. R* was a bit tipsy apparently so stayed behind. D* was already at work with me…instead of covering my shift like I wanted he decided to just sit his ass there for many hour. Ugh.
S* showed up with some laundry, so we sat around, watched the eclipse, chatted and all that. The colors were amazing. Had to explain to D* that only one side of the moon faces the earth because it’s rotation and revolution around earth make it so. I would have gone into more details, but he had trouble grasping that… Eventually, he left and it was just me and S*. She decided to stay with me all night to keep me awake as I wasn’t feeling all that great and was extremely tired. It was a fun night.

Tuesday I actually slept a decent amount and we played some games, watched the Stars game, R* dyed his hair, and then made plans to go on a driving adventure late at night. It was R*, S*, C*, J* and me all piled into the SUV. We went to one of the haunted places nearby, then drove around and headed to the park. Had a great time, even though I was freezing. I really should have brought a jacket. Quite late at night we all headed to our place and hung out. As time passed the others went home, R* went to bed and it was just me and S* again. Poke wars, netflix (I think there was netflix) and chatting and stuff, she ended up giving me a pressed bluebonnet she found packed away, what is cool is that bluebonnets are my favorite flower and she had this one for a long time before I even told her lol…I ended up going to bed past 11 in the morning and slept just a few hours. When I woke up I learned that S* was up until 2:30 in the after noon. I showered and me and R* sat around doing nothing most of the day. I was quite tired. R* was running his new gaming system ideas by me, it seems like a good one. Can’t wait to see all the rules put down and for all of us to give it a go. Evening came by and S* crawled out of bed. She dyed her hair as well, a dark, kinda coppery, red. It looks awesome. We all just chill and R* gets the idea to grab blankets and friends and snacks and to go layout under the stars out by his dad’s house. It’s way out there in the country so there is no light pollution. It is beautiful. Unfortunately, when we get out there the clouds decide to cover the sky so there is no star gazing, just relaxing under the sky, talking, and the like. Good times.

Before it gets too late we head home and we all just chill some more. Eventually, people go to bed, or to their homes, and me and S* are up again. We watch some Raising Arizona, Dead Like me, sit and chill and chat and stuff…until after six in the morning and I go to bed.

Past couple of nights have been interesting. A lot of thoughts have been running through my head and I’m not entirely sure what to make of them. Each day I hope to wake up with an answer or something…but so far nothing. -sigh-

Anywho..I need to shower and work on my defensive driving today. That is going to be so dull.

I love my roommates. Both of them. Greatest friends ever. I worry that I might mess things up some day.

I talk

So, last night was interesting. It was an absolute blast…to a point.
We we’re all sitting around, after naps and such, we started watching the Stars game, and during the last bit R* gets the idea to go and play drunken Soul Caliber 4 at M*’s house once the Stars game was over that is. It finished, Stars won, and we all piled into the SUV and headed over to play and drink and drink and play. We start and I am getting my tail whooped…that is until I start drinking. After the first whiskey and soda (I say “soda” because I cannot recall which kind, I know it had to be Dr. Pepper or Pepsi as I drank both….) I was tipsy, it has been a while since I drank, plus I mix them strong. Before my third match I already downed two, and soon enough I had more than five in me and several swigs of some strange awful tasting grape stuff….

Apparently I suck at Soul Caliber…until I am drunk, because after that I was kicking ass, well…according to what they said. We all had been drinking, me more than most. I was silly after the first few, and by the forth one I was plastered. S* tried to tell me I had enough, but I insisted and kept on. The fifth was the nail in the coffin. After that, and a few more rounds of the game I went outside for some air, leaving my jacket and shoes behind…I plopped down in the chair and breathed in the cold air. I was feeling quite sick and thought that I might spew any minute. S* and R* come to see if I’m okay, and then we all head home. I was wasted and collapsed on the couch and supposedly passed out for a bit. I woke up with my blanket on me and S* keeping an eye on me as well. She brought me water and a bucket…just in case. She stayed with me for a while, watching netflix while I snored away…apparently really loud…as when I woke later my throat was killing me. She heads off to bed, I’m feeling bad from both drinking and that S* stayed up to make sure I was okay. First week with my friends and one already has to take care of me….-shakes head- Though I’ve given her permission to be more forceful when I am about to drink way too much.

And…I talk.
I did the typical “I love you guys” stuff, and all that. Which seemed perfectly fine at the time but embarrassing the next day…I notice some missed calls on my phone and call back…it was a drunk dial so I figured that past midnight wasn’t too late to call back. They were still drunk. It was hilarious. After the call, I talk more. Apparently I talk a lot when drunk…yeah…typical as well. I go on about god-knows-what and also mention this chick I used to have a major crush on, though I don’t anymore. I could have talked about anything and I can’t quite recall what I said.

So, yeah, I wake up on the couch around six in the morning then gather my blankie and head to bed. I’m sure to drink plenty of water and take some Aleve to make sure I don’t wake up with a hangover. Luckily, I didn’t. Luckily I didn’t get sick either. I was able to sleep it off. While I had fun, I also had too much fun…and too much whiskey…I felt sick to my stomach most of the time I was awake. Glad that’s over and it is probably going to be a while before I drink again. I tend to do that. Drink a lot, stay away from booze for a month or more…usually more…with maybe a beer here and there…never enough to even get a slight buzz…then I drink a lot again and start the cycle over. Though, ever since finals were over I’ve been wanted to get drunk.

I slept half the day…should have slept longer as I work Sunday nights. But I stay up, watch the next Stars game, chat, play Mario, chat, gather things and head to work. I’m a bit tired at the moment, but thats fine. I don’t have to get up early for school or anything, so I can sleep in.

My dreams were severely weird…though I cannot recall them at all…besides the point of them being weird. I recall R* and S* in them…as well as a trailer house…

That’s all for now I suppose…Netflix or WoW is next on my list…
Oh, I am quickly becoming a hockey fan…

Catch Up

Things are good.
Last Thursday was an awesome day, despite having a math final. While taking the test I was near panicky as I seemed to have forgot a few small, but major, parts of the formulas. The instructor put the formulas on the board, but I forgot what certain parts were. I finished what I could, then overheard him mention to another student what “n” represented…so I went back and finished the previous problems. I think I did at least decent…and that’s all I care for.
I’m not quite certain how the rest of the day went….pretty much a blur until that night. Gamma World night. It was a blast, and as usual hilarious. “Are they holding the cow handsome?” xD It was an epic night despite during the last fight my character slipped out of the Time Stream, and got distracted, causing him to vanish for several hours. During this time another character was killed. The game ended shortly after that, but before my character came back. This will make for an interesting next game night as my character, Hey Zoos (an electrokinetic giant who is about as sharp as a bowling ball) considered himself to be the protector of Taco, the character who was killed (who was a gravity manipulating doppelganger). Especially since he died while Hey Zoos was off napping outside of Time.

After that we hung out a bit then came back home. We all hung out, then R* headed off to bed and me and S* hung out, talking all night…from everything from reality, spirituality, neurotic tendencies, and…stuff lol. It was nice to just sit and talk, I rarely talk that much to anyone, but with S* it just happens. I even mentioned things that probably only one other person knows…
Six am rolled around and I decided it was bed time, slept…then woke up four hours later. The day was quite tame and later I went to Wal-Mart to pick up some household essentials and asked if S* wanted to join me, so off we went. After groceries I was hungry and asked S* if she was. We decided pizza was good so I picked up a couple of pizzas to feed us all and we headed home and watched netflix. Later R* went to hang out with some peoples and me and S* stayed behind, and I finally got to watch First Contact. It was a good movie, but I had to ask a couple of questions as I have never really been into Star Trek. Only seen a handful of the TNG stuff and the new Star Trek film.

Oh, I also got my room all sorted out and stuff. Thins are unpacked and put away. Even have my books in bookshelves, courtesy of S*. It’s nice. My room is quite awesome.
Today has been a day of netflix and hanging around. Electrician type people came by to fix whatever happened a couple days ago. And now roomies are napping and I’m huddled in my room with the laptop. mmmmm comfy

Tonight might be a gaming night…though not sure…as another friend has to work late. We’ll see though.

I need to start looking for either a full-time job or another part-time job. I’d prefer a night job as I’ve grown accustomed to working nights. I feel you can get more out of the day. Work nights, sleep part of the day, you still have the rest of the day to do stuff. If you work days chances are you get off late and have no time to do much.

It’s really nice here, I’m enjoying it quite a bit…I just hope I don’t get annoying or anything…

New Roof

It has been a bit since my lance entry, though it was mainly because of me being busy. Finals are this week, had to finish up my photo project…oh, and I moved. Yup, though since I’ve previously have mentioned it, it shouldn’t be a surprise. I officially moved in yesterday. After I got off work in the morning, I headed home, did some packing, went to school to take my Brit Lit final, printed off my photos (that was a chore as the printer kept giving me troubles), headed home, called S*, and we got to loading up our trucks. I was attempting a sneaky move away, pack my stuff, move out, and see how long it takes for my roommate to notice that I’m no longer there. Though it didn’t go that way. As we were about to climb in the trucks and drive off, having loaded up the last of my stuff, roommate drives up. I explain that since I have yet to pay rent and may not be able to, I decided to move out so I would not end up owing him another four months rent like I did last summer. He was surprised, but understood. I handed over my key and drove off.

So, we unloaded my stuff into my room, in the middle of it I had a low blood-sugar attack as I have yet to eat anything since I was at work the previous night and it was now evening of a new day (not to mention that I have been awake as well), after some orange juice I was able to finish the unloading. The we all collapsed on the couch. I put off unpacking for as long as possible, but got around to it shortly. Well, I really just put my dresser back together, made my bed, and put clothes away. I made my way back into the living room where we all hung out again. Later C* dropped by, but I was getting sleepy (previously mentioned lack of sleep) and S* noticed and told me I should go sleep, which I agreed and headed to bed. I slept about nine hours and woke up around six in the morning…or a bit past that. Showered.
S* was already awake and R* was on the couch sorta sleeping. It was now the day for my photography final…which was a critique of the photos we had to present. Being lazy I did not want to go through the effort of mounting the photos on foam-core board and called up a framing store for mats. They said they had some pre-cut ones so I thought I’d give it a try. S* came with me…the store was quite awesome…it was attached to a used book store that had a coffee shop inside…which I know claim has the best Iced Chai I’ve ever tasted. Anywho, I found some mats, had the lady there mat my photos while me and S* explored the bookstore and drank our chai.

Then came the final…I was about 15 minutes late and near panicked…when I show up only two people were there…the rest showed up later…so no biggy…
Critique went quite well, though not many cared for one of my photos that had a sprig of grass close up and out of focus in the shot. I liked it for that reason. But, eh. Can’t please everyone.

Afterwards I came back home…heh, it is strange, in a good way, to call this new place home…and after some chatting I offer to buy lunch for me and S*. Food. Home again. Hanging out. Music. Sing-a-longs. Then later…the Best Movie I’ve Ever Seen!!!
Scott Pilgrim Vs The World
ZOMG! So awesome. So nerdy. I seriously believe no movie can compare to the sheer epicness of that one film. Brilliant! Awesome! Epic!
I could watch that movie many times xD and probably will.
Though right now I have some studying to do and probably should go to sleep…I’m a bit tired….and no, not all of my stuff is unpacked yet.

The only downside today was apparently that my email got hacked…and sent a mass email that contained a link…fecking bastards

Arm Biting and Mouse Milking

It’s been a little while since last update, though I’ve been a bit busy…with school, friends, and Dexter. I’m so addicted to that show. I’ve just recently finished the second season. All I have to say is: “Zomg! Awesome!”

I’m not sure what my last post was about, so there might be some gaps, but that’s fine. This week was the last official week of classes, not counting finals. I turned in one final on friday (feels like today as I’ve been up a while) and then I have one next tuesday, one wednesday, and one thursday. Tuesday will be Brit Lit I. Wednesday will be final critique and turn in of the seven photos we have to have printed and mounted/framed. Thursday is math. I wont be writing the paper for Genre studies, the beast of a professor changed her grading system for the semester. And it just happens to have changed to count the class participation and those mysterious online discussion topics more than they originally counted for, which leaves me with a large F in the class and the final paper will have to have an A for me to pass. Coincidence? I doubt it. So, I’m not going to trouble myself with writing the paper. I’ll retake the class this summer or even next Fall. With a different instructor. Normally I’d be all sorts of depressed and stuff, but I’m not. Yeah, I’m upset, but hey…I’ve got stuff to look forward to regardless. I had my boss send me emails of openings within the entire “company” I work for…(charity actually) and since I’m a current employee, I get dibs on the jobs before outside people. So, if someone who does not work within this “company” and is applying for the same job, and we have similar qualifications…I get the job. So, that’s good, I’ll also be looking elsewhere and trying to further my “career” in writing and photography…anyway I can. And, I’ll be shortly moving in with my awesome friends.

Past couple of nights have been crazy. Thursday we hung out at the M’s for M’s birthday, typical night…silliness, poking, slapping, biting, thieving (lol), then I hung out at S* and R*’s place. Watched some Dexter with S*, played with the cats, then headed home around 2 or 3…I was going to go to bed, but I was hungry…so I ate and watched Dexter..then more Dexter and more…then it was 6:30 in the morning and I had to force myself to stop and sleep. Friday, I work up at noon-ish…woke up completely then began to write my paper for my online class. Had trouble submitting it as the online site said it was late and but the syllabus said it wasn’t due until much later. Got a hold of the instructor and was told to email it instead. Crisis averted.
Afterwards I finished off the second season of Dexter and S* wanted to know if I was going to hang out at M*’s with them again. I was iffy…was thinking of play WoW then going to bed early…early for me that is…but decided it go over anyways. I show up and there is a lot of people there…I’m feeling awkward as it is as my hair would not cooperate and was in too many directions and partly defying gravity…I was antisocial and quite for a good while…especially as more people showed up…lots of people…drinking. It would have been more comfortable for me to be around that many people if I had a drink as well, but since I have not ate the entire day…booze would have made me feel quite sick. So I stayed sober. (Yes…it takes at least a bit of alcohol for me to be comfortable around lots of people.)
S* and I did our poking and such, flipflop was stolen often, but I kept my earring. At one point I squished her finger…it’s done by curling the little finger, putting pressure on the tip by the nail…your thumb on the back of the finger…squeezing together and pulling up on it at the same time. It has been called “milking the mouse” in my family and friends from my younger days. It can be extremely painful. So painful that even a tough person who can handle pain…will buckle from the pain. And once experienced…will cause people to nearly freak out when they sense it is about to happen again. It hurts…very very much.
Well…I did that to S*…but did it too hard…as she got a very good dose of the pain from it. She got silent, still, and did not look happy…at all. I knew that look too…I hurt her. I felt so so horrible. What the hell was I thinking doing that so hard? I meant to only give out a taste of the pain, as she can handle pain really well. But, it’s hard for the person doing the “milking” to know how much pressure they are applying. It doesnt take much at all….Geez, that was such an asshole thing for me to do. Lots of thoughts ran through my head…one of which was…”she’s gonna kill me in a bit” another was “well, I think I just caused an end to our rough housing.”
After a while, she seemed ok…more or less..and started horse playing again with me. I felt relieved, and even taught her how to do it. Which she promptly administrated to me…with great results and lots of pain…she got me twice as well. Though, I still feel very bad about it. Even though our rough housing causes bruises and such…I still am wary of doing too much harm…its why I dont bite all that hard…-sigh-
Speaking of bites…I have three of varying degrees on my arm…she as a few too…one or two by me…and one big one…very bruised by J*..aka Red…aka The Devil (lol).
So that’s how the night went mostly. I never felt completely comfortable, but that’s fine…all good…still had a lot of fun, and do not regret hanging out at all. Though I still feel bad for hurting S*.

Anywho…we then went to go eat…as at that point it has been 14 hours since I’ve eaten anything (not counting the six hours asleep). And now…I am here…writing this entry…at 5:30am….and about to go to bed. I need some sleep.

Sleepless in…er…bed…?

Buuuuggggh

Sleep, you elusive bastard!
Okay…while I thought there was class today, turns out it was another workday. So, after I woke up and realized that bit…I thought I could go back to sleep as it has not been a full six hours of sleep yet, and frankly, I want some flippin’ sleep. Apparently not. I do need to work on my extra credit for math today. Two, two-page papers. Yeah, that’ll take me a whole…what…couple hours tops…including do the “research” for it. Things are going…good. Though I am even further certain that my passing the class with the beast professor is looking more and more slim. I’m damn near about to decide to just say “f#$% it” and just let myself fail. That way I won’t have to worry about the stress of the paper. Yeah, that means I won’t graduate, but I can always come back later, take that one class, then graduate. It’s not like the jobs I want require a degree…don’t get me wrong…I am getting one…or all this time and money would be a waste. I’m still thinking about it. I sent a message to my sister about this, since she cosigned the loan that got me through the semester. Though she hasn’t replied just yet…and that makes me think she might be upset. I also gave her details of when I’m coming down to visit.
If she doesn’t reply back soon, I’m just going to cancel the trip. Simple as that. They want to see me more that I want to go there and see them. I find it funny…not “haha” funny, but like “annoying” funny…that they go on about wanting to see me, how much they miss me, you know…all of that stuff. But, whenever it comes down to it, it is always about them wanting me to go to them. If they miss me as much as they claim, why not come to me? And since they are not paying for my traveling, it’d make it much more easier on me.
Hell, if I end up staying here, then that means I can help clean that room out at my friends and even possibly move in sooner. I’m still very excited about this. Which is odd, very odd, as I’ve never been one to ever be excited about roommates, even ones who are friends, but S* and R*, they’re different. Though apparently S* is infatuated with my pillows, gonna have to keep them under lock and key. Lolz, kidding.

Past couple of days/nights have been nice. Monday night I finished my paper for Brit Lit, then got the new expansion for WoW and played it the rest of the night, which after the paper wasn’t much of a night left. It is awesome. I made a goblin, and the starting area is amazing. Later on S* got online and made one as well, and we chatted on RealID while we did our own quests. Afterwards I headed home, showered, went to classes, had a Math test, I think I only missed one problem…if all the others were right, and I am sure they are, then I missed one…because I didn’t do it…because I had no clue at all how to.
Then it was time for Brit Lit. Turns out, the paper is now due on Thursday. So I finished it early then…which is good, but it makes my procrastination side feel like it was used like a cheap whore. -sigh- Least it is out of the way. Oh, and we discussed Paradise Lost, once again, and the subject brought up was the one I actually wrote my paper on, the true hero of the epic poem. So, I was unusually vocal in class, participating a lot more than usual, because…well…I wrote about it so it was all fresh in my mind. And I learned that my professor agrees with me as well, which is bonus. Then I waited for the next class while editing some photos, then went to class, then more photo editing, then home. Got some food, watched some Dexter…fell asleep as I was exhausted. Woke up with a horrible horrible cramp.
Now, the weird part was, that while my calf muscle decided to spaz out and punish me for unknown deeds, the thoughts in my head, having been woken up by this god awful cramp from hell, was that somehow I was trapped by some serial killer who had some rig that made it impossible for my leg to move without extreme pain. Dexter plus little tiny nap, plus massive cramp, plus sleep haze equals weird semi-conscious thoughts.
After that I hopped on WoW once more…and rerolled a new gobby. Why? Because I was earlier reminded of an epic word I invented, by mistake. Tortato! Which I determined must be my gobs name. So, Tortato the goblin hunter was born. And playing with friends began…well…once I caught up to their level that is.

So, yeah, here I sit…tired…and unable to sleep. I’m thinking breakfast…oatmeal sounds nice. Oatmeal, toast, and a big glass of milk.

Nerd Fort

While yesterday was total stress, today is quite a bit…not stress.
Yesterday everything hit me all at once. I was majorly stressed out with thoughts of money, school, bills…all that. I basically broke. I felt so overwhelmed that…I actually cried. No matter what I tried…for the most of that night I was in bed, crying. Every time I closed my eyes, I’d feel a tightening in my chest, you know how stress feels, and then tears would stream down my face…or rather across…as I was laying down.
Finally I was able to fall asleep, not for too long, about five hours…I woke up feeling quite a bit better, though still had that worry cloud over me. I sat around, watched some television…then I grabbed my camera and went out for a drive and to take photos. I felt much better after that, still a bit with the worry cloud, but much better.

I sent a text to S* to see what her and R* were up to, they were getting groceries so she text me back later. Neither of us were up to anything so I dropped by to hang out, joking around with S* while watching R* play a Resident Evil game on their Wii. After a bit, R* brought up a topic that they discussed earlier. They asked that since I was having rent problems and bills and all that stuff, if I’d like to move in with them. I was a bit shocked even though S* mentioned the previous night that if I needed a place to stay for transition that I could stay with them, but now I’ve been asked to move in. I was speechless for a good while. It sounded like a good idea but I was unsure about it as I did not want to bum off them and get in the way of their privacy. Each of us have a tendency to be unsocial. We discussed it for a good while, I’d contribute to bills and such so I wouldn’t feel like such a bum and to help them out. They went over things that I should expect while there, and none of it bothers me. By the end of the discussion I accepted. We then began to talk about all the gaming/nerd/fun possibilities that could come of this. I felt happy, so very thankful, and I am looking forward to it. I love my friends.
After all that we got tamales and I was introduced to Dexter. Good show by the way. Midnight came by and I decided to head home. I was a bit tired.

Arriving home I tried to sleep, but it didn’t work, head was too loud. I thought about watching more Dexter but played WoW instead, ran through a couple of dungeons, did some mining (still trying to get the materials for the Mechano-Hog…it is going to be one pricey mount…even if I get all the mats myself…because there are some parts that have to be bought and those are expensive).
I played for a couple hours and now I’m in bed. Writing this.

No class tomorrow, but I don’t want to sleep all day, so I want to sleep as much as I can tonight. I want to work on my paper before I have to go to work. Hopefully -crosses fingers- I can finish it before work. Maybe if I do that, S* and R* could stop by work and hang out if they aren’t busy or anything. Though, that all depends if I can get the paper finished before then. Not a difficult paper. Thought it always takes me a while to actually start writing. Once I get the introduction finished then the rest just flows…usually. It’s the intro that always takes me a while.

I’m really looking forward to being the roommate of S* and R*. I hope I don’t annoy them and I hope things don’t get awkward…can’t think of why though.

Anywho, I’m going to bed.

Oh, and since I know you read this…

-Sneak Attack!!!-